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Uncharted Space: Elon Musk’s Intervention

This Elon Musk mega-mess is now, finally, too shrill to ignore. With Larry Ellison’s recent intervention of his friend and protégé cut short when Musk reportedly left before help would hold, Ellison is now in a muddle. A muddle millions relate to. If I could, I would encourage Ellison not to give up, not give in, and not take NO as a final answer.

Musk is, as we all know, the self-made richest man on the planet, whose impaired management of X, SpaceX & Tesla over many years now is costing shareholders billions of dollars in losses. While Musk has all the money and maybe even all the drugs one could desire, including the K, the X, the Cocaine, and the LSD, he lacks the peace of mind that comes from emotional and physical stability.

For those coming in cold, The Wall Street Journal’s incredibly well-researched and sourced story began the national conversation over the mix of mind-altering drugs sitting in the middle of the Musk mess. The Journal’s series alleges how ketamine, acid, MDMA, cannabis, and stimulants are at the core of Musk’s dysregulation at the center of the fire burning up Tesla, X, and SpaceX.

Long before the current headlines over well-researched articles in The Journal appeared, the private life of Elon Musk intersected with the public workplace of his life. For those in the public eye, headlines are often an action-triggering event. A video released by SpaceX in 2017 shows Musk during a mic-in-hand presentation, nosediving into baby babble, rambling, and slurring his words.

There have been no reassurances from the boards to calm investor fear. The opposite has occurred in fact as two directors departed after failing to see their impaired leader concerns taken seriously.

As the interventionist corporations, movie studios, and intimates call to keep suffering humans out of the headlines, what’s clear to me is that Elon has an absence of those who can leverage the current crisis to intervene. Yet what connects Musk with so many who struggle right in front of us, is that the need for an intervention showed itself long ago, only to be met by little or no action.

In the US each year more than 350 million struggle with substance use, mental health needs, and eating disorders. Most will never receive meaningful help, burning up in an inferno of their own making.

When the fellow on fire is also one of the planet’s richest, intervening is a tall order. The dual relationships Musk has with vendors NASA and the US Department of Defense alone make for high-intensity but also highly viable intervention leverage.

“People close to Musk, who is now 52, said his drug use is ongoing, especially his consumption of ketamine,” The Journal reports. The behavior is not sustainable. I know as I have managed more than 1,300 interventions since beginning this work nearly 20 years ago.

I’ve never met Elon and nobody in his circle has asked me to intervene. As the nation’s leading interventionist, I started getting Elon inquiries by the press a few years ago. I emailed Elon once to let him know he’s welcome to ring me. It bounced, undeliverable.

I was intrinsically linked to stimulants, alcohol, ketamine, and nicotine and my circle of support didn’t take NO for an answer. Thank goodness or I’m sure I would be dead. A video of me did exist, before the age of YouTube, that was damning and sped up the intervention that saved my life.

An invitational intervention, the evidence-based method I have practiced for nearly two decades, is collaborative and coercive by nature. In invitational intervention, we circle up the voices that matter—representatives from the job, board, family, lawyers, vendors, insurance reps, friends, doctors, bankers, and the like, to leverage organ driving at the moment with a less than optimal operating system. We harness the various relationships because together we do what we cannot apart. We interrupt chaos and introduce the notion of a time-out for mental health care, support, and yes, treatment. The more leverage points we have, the better.

Considering Elon’s understood structure, his world features opportunities from every category—the ideal prospect. The more opportunities, the more strength in the arena. I empathize with the circles surrounding Musk in this curious time. Who will be brave enough to circle up and intervene? Who will be remembered as a helper instead of a partner in his demise?

Musk is undoubtedly a visionary creator and entrepreneur. A hundred years from now his name will likely follow Edison, Tesla, and Ford when listing industrial geniuses. Whether it ends with how he died at a young age, tragically, due to mental health and addiction issues remains to be seen. An intervention is not an indictment. Rather, it is a constructive shot over the bow, aimed at addressing concerns and supporting an individual’s path to transformation and change. Somebody step up and rally the troops. Please! This man is dying in plain sight.

Money, fame, genius, power—none change the psychology and emotions people go through when trying to help a loved one. Elon Musk is just like all of us in this way: We live and breathe and die in plain sight, as those around us take NO and decide that is the final answer. My hope is Larry Ellison reboots his intervention effort and helps his friend say YES to help before the final word is spoken.

How to Hire an Interventionist?

Discovering that a loved one is entangled in the shackles of substance abuse can be a heart-wrenching reality to face. It’s an uphill battle, fraught with emotional turmoil, uncertainty, and the dire need for professional guidance. As someone invested in the welfare of a cherished one, taking the first step towards pulling them back from the abyss of addiction is fundamental.

This guide will walk you through the steps on how to hire an interventionist, a crucial ally in your loved one’s journey toward recovery. With Intervention.com by your side, you’re not alone in this. Let’s embark on this path together.

What is the Role of an Interventionist?

An interventionist serves as a beacon of light, guiding individuals through the often tumultuous path of addressing alcohol or drug addiction. Their role is to provide professional guidance and a structured approach toward confronting the individual struggling with addiction, while nurturing a safe and constructive environment. The significance of their expertise cannot be overstated as they are adept at addressing the challenging emotional dynamics that addiction entails.

Building a Support Circle

A crucial part of the intervention process is assembling a support circle comprising family, friends, and loved ones. Your interventionist is instrumental in this phase, helping identify and mobilize a network of individuals who care deeply and are committed to the cause. This circle provides moral support and reinforces the message of change, forming a united front against the harrowing clutches of addiction.

Educating the Intervention Team

Your interventionist will orchestrate pre-intervention meetings to educate the support circle on the intervention process, what to expect, and how to navigate potential roadblocks. Addressing concerns, fears, and misconceptions head-on, they equip you with the necessary tools and understanding to approach the intervention with confidence and a clear roadmap.

Facilitating The Intervention

Your interventionist, acting as a neutral mediator, facilitates a respectful dialogue between the individual and the support circle on the day of the intervention. Their expertise ensures the conversation remains focused, respectful, and constructive, keeping the ultimate goal of acceptance and treatment within sight.

Post-Intervention Guidance

The intervention is only the first step on the long road to recovery. Post-intervention, your trusted interventionist continues to offer invaluable support and guidance for both the individual and the family. They help map out the subsequent steps, whether it’s detox, therapy, or other recovery plans, ensuring you are well-equipped to traverse the path to sobriety.

When to Consider Hiring an Interventionist?

Interventionist supporting a family member seeking professional help for a loved one struggling with addiction

You’ve probably noticed some unsettling changes in your loved one — a shift in their behavior, secretive actions, or perhaps a decline in their health and well-being due to eating disorders. Recognizing the addiction signs and behaviors is the first step.

Yet, it’s not always crystal clear. Sometimes, families try to stage their interventions, believing that sheer love and willpower can pull their dear ones out of the abyss. Sadly, many face challenges: emotionally charged confrontations, denial, or even worsening the addicted individual’s behavior. It’s heartbreaking and often counterproductive.

That is where the expertise of an interventionist becomes invaluable. Waiting for a “rock bottom” moment can be too late. Being proactive, with the aid of a professional, might just be the catalyst for turning things around.

What are the Steps to Hiring an Interventionist?

The journey towards staging an intervention starts long before the day itself, and it commences with acknowledging the severe need for professional guidance. Here’s how to navigate through this process:

Recognize the Need

You might have been noticing some alarming signs but brushing them off, hoping things would improve. Discerning the difference between casual substance use and a burgeoning addiction is essential. If you’re losing sleep over a loved one’s destructive behavior, it’s a clear sign that professional help is necessary. Accepting the gravity of the situation is your first stride toward a solution.

Research and Shortlist Professionals

Your next step is delving into some research. A great starting point is consulting reputable professional organizations in the intervention field. Look for interventionists with the proper credentials and ample experience. Remember, not all interventionists are created equal; picking a certified and seasoned professional could make a significant difference in the effectiveness of the intervention.

Interview Potential Interventionists

Once you have a shortlist, it’s time to get on the phone or meet in person. Ask about their experience, methodology, and success rate. It’s also crucial to gauge how comfortable you feel with them. Are their values aligned with yours? Do they exhibit empathy, understanding, and a structured approach towards addiction? Your loved one’s future could hinge on making the right choice, so take your time to make an informed decision.

Coordinate and Plan the Intervention

With the proper interventionist by your side, you’ll orchestrate a well-structured and impactful intervention. Your interventionist will prepare you and your family on what to expect, how to communicate effectively, and how to react to possible scenarios. Coordinating the logistics, setting the right tone, and preparing emotionally for the intervention are crucial steps to ensure a successful outcome.

What are the Benefits of Hiring an Interventionist?

Friends supporting and hugging each other during intervention meeting

Hiring an interventionist offers a multitude of benefits that not only address the addiction but also provide a support system for everyone involved. Here’s what you stand to gain:

  • Professional Guidance: An interventionist brings a wealth of knowledge and expertise, guiding families through a process they might not be familiar with. This ensures the intervention is structured and effective.
  • Neutral Mediator: Emotions can run high during interventions. A professional serves as an impartial mediator, ensuring conversations remain constructive and centered on recovery.
  • Educational Insight: Before the intervention, families are educated about addiction, creating a well-informed support circle that understands the dynamics at play.
  • Higher Success Rate: With their experience, interventionists increase the likelihood of the individual accepting help, compared to self-orchestrated interventions.
  • Professional Networking: Interventionists have connections with treatment centers and can facilitate a smooth transition into a rehabilitation program, ensuring continuity of care.
  • Pre- and Post-Intervention Support: Their role isn’t just limited to the intervention. They provide crucial guidance before and map out subsequent steps after the intervention.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

1. How do I know if the interventionist is the right fit for our situation?
It’s crucial to have an interventionist who resonates with the family’s values and understands the unique dynamics at play. During the interview process, gauge their approach, experience, and ensure they have a sound plan tailored to your loved one’s needs.

2. How long does the whole process of intervention take?
The length can vary significantly depending on the complexity of the situation and the individual’s readiness to accept help. It might take days or even weeks of preparation, followed by the intervention itself, and the subsequent transition into treatment.

3. What happens if the intervention is unsuccessful?
Not every intervention leads to acceptance of treatment. However, it’s a step toward making the individual aware of the gravity of their situation. Continued support, love, and a follow-up intervention could be the course of action.

4. How do we ensure the confidentiality of the intervention process?
Professional interventionists uphold strict ethical standards. Respecting client confidentiality is paramount. Rest assured, details of the intervention, and any shared personal information remain private and protected.

5. What should be the ideal location for an intervention?
The location should be non-threatening and comfortable for the individual. It could be a home, a neutral family friend’s place, or even a professional setting recommended by the interventionist.

Find an Interventionist Near You

Every step you take towards seeking professional intervention is a stride toward the hope of recovery and a brighter future for your loved one. At Intervention.com, we believe in the power of collective strength and are here to be your pillar of support.

Time is of the essence when confronting addiction. Don’t let another second slip away. Click the button below to connect with our vast network of certified interventionists and get immediate assistance tailored to your situation. Let’s embark on this journey to healing together!

Defusing the Tasty Timebomb & Loving the Lungs You’re With

If there’s one thing that sticks to your brain from reading my words at this moment, love the lungs you’re with.

A moment after my first deep breath this morning, I thought back to my friend Simi. Simi lived in in Room 22W, at Valley West Retirement Center in Eugene, Oregon. The old folks home was my side hustle from the time I was 8 till 15 when I moved with my family to Yorba Linda, California. I played hymns there at Valley West, as I called it, most Sunday mornings.

Old people love a kid who plays the piano or does a trick that they can sing along with! I didn’t get a nickel for it, but it paid me in lessons and love. See, to this day, I love the church hymns I grew up hammering out and hollering along to. Playing hymns is like breathing to me. Without thought. Life giving.

My life till 15 was a good life, in so many ways. It was days after  I moved to Southern California that I started something I swore would never occur. I started smoking. For twenty years, I lit, puffed and tossed to the ground the smoky sticks. I got sick lungs as a result. Which brings me to the biggest health crisis on the planet today – vaping, and the ticking time bombs vaping has implanted in the hundreds of millions who do it.

I’ve never vaped, since I quit smoking eighteen years back. Vaping nicotine is incredibly addicting, and perfectly devised to addict and afllict the lungs of those who call it their “bad habit.” More than a bad habit, vaping is an awful deadly habit that totals the fragile tissue that make up our beautiful pink lungs. It is not better than smoking cigarettes.

“Vaping gave me lungs that make it feel like an elephant is sitting on my chest while I try to grab oxygen from the air I suck in.” That’s how a friend I met in my work advocating for lung health described the state of her lungs after she had for three years. She is now on the lung transplant list. She is unlikely to get new lungs. She is more likely to die from vaping.

She is one of the nearly uncounted who has Vaping Associated Lung Injury (VALI). I use the word uncounted, and it makes me sick even thinking how this has come to be – this no-counting bullshit. The same scoundrels who swore under oath that cigarettes were safe and non-addictive while enslaving a nation are the same ones keeping regulations and data unreliable. They do this by flooding the market with nicotine juice and fake studies that show vaping is not a problem – and in some cases like the FRENCH STUDY, that vaping is a boon to lung health.

On Sunday mornings as a kid at Valley West, Simi was my favorite. I know we’re not supposed to have favorites but she was a fun, full-of-life, gal of just 65, but as the nurse told me “she has bum lungs from smoking two packs a day for 50 years.” At 65, Simi was younger than most there. Simi was also much sicker than most of the other residents, many in their 90s. A lifelong smoker, Simi was the first person I remember witnessing who had super sick lungs. I was ten years old when I first met her. By the age of eleven she had died after incredible suffering.

“Why won’t they fix your lungs,” I asked her. Cussing like sailor, Simi told me she had done it to herself, and there was no fixing lungs like hers, which were no longer able to function and do what they were meant to do.

How about a transplant, I asked Simi.

“Not possible,” she told me as she heaved out the words. “Lung transplants aren’t possible. I should have loved the lungs I’m with,” I remember she gasped resolutely.

I promised her I would never smoke, never ever pick that up as a habit. I believed her. I believed myself as I said what I said. Within four years, I was the start of a statistic – a teen smoker. A statistic reflecting the substance that addicts more on the planet and more easily than anything: NICOTINE. And that’s happening all over again as vaping rates in teens soar after smoking amongst teens dropping for decades.

If you vape or are one of the 2.5 million teens in the USA who vape, there are just 2600 lungs available that get transplanted each year.

If you vape, you are crafting a terrible time bomb in the palm of your hands as the result of those cute sexy colorful, safe-looking vape you lift, hand to mouth, to dose yourself.

The soaring sales of flavored e-cigarettes in the United States and the consequent efforts by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to impose restrictions on them.

 

Your Suffering Teen: The 7 Most Important Truths

Most parents know the teenage years can be a challenging time for both parents and their adolescent children. Adolescence is a time of significant growth and development, both physically and emotionally. As a parent, it’s essential to understand your teenager and their changing needs during this period. Here are some critical things that every parent should know about their teen that can hopefully make this transitional time much smoother:

1. Every Sunrise Means Another Independence Day

One of the most significant struggles that teenagers face is their desire for independence.  Much like the toddler years where your child wanted to start trying to do a lot of things on their own without your interference, you’ll now find yourself watching your adolescent going through another phase of this newfound autonomy. As they begin to mature and develop their own sense of identity, they often feel a strong need to break free from their parents’ rules and guidelines.  This is normal! While this can be unnerving for parents to navigate, it’s essential to remember that this is a natural and healthy part of the developmental process. It’s crucial to give your teenager the freedom and space they need to explore their independence while still setting clear boundaries and expectations.  Invite them to keep communication open while they navigate their transition.

2. The Maturing Brain Remains a Work in Progress

During adolescence, the brain undergoes significant changes that impact your teenager’s behavior and decision-making. The prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for decision-making, planning, and impulse control, is still developing during the teenage years and won’t be completely done developing until early twenties. This means that your teen may struggle with making good decisions and controlling their impulses, even if they know the right thing to do. It’s important to be patient with your teen and offer guidance and support as they learn to navigate their changing brain and behavior.  Sometimes “doing their best” could change on any given day.

3. Environment Matters More than Most Things

Teenagers need and value a supportive environment where they feel safe to express themselves and their emotions. As they navigate the challenges of adolescence, they may struggle with low self-esteem, anxiety, or low moods. It’s essential to create an open and welcoming environment where your teen feels comfortable talking about their feelings and emotions. Encourage your teenager to express themselves and offer support and guidance as they work through their challenges.  When your teen comes to you to talk, ask them if they want emotional support or solutions/feedback.

4. Social Pressures are Carrying Cost & Weight

Teenagers face a significant amount of pressure from their peers and social media. They may feel like they need to conform to certain social standards or expectations to fit in with their friends or be perceived a certain way. In the stage of adolescence, it is normal for teenagers to feel like their social circle is their whole world.  This pressure can lead to risky behaviors, such as substance abuse or engaging in sexual activity before they’re ready. It’s important to have open and honest conversations with your teenager about the risks and consequences of these behaviors and help them build the confidence to make their own decisions.

5. Managing Emotions Remains a Daily Challenge

Managing Emotions Remains a Daily Challenge for teens

The teenage years can be an emotional rollercoaster. As your teenager’s brain develops, they may struggle with regulating their emotions and coping with stress. The brain is changing, the body is morphing. It’s essential to help your teen develop healthy coping mechanisms, such as exercise or talking to a trusted friend, therapist, or family member. Encourage your teen to find healthy outlets for their emotions, and be available to listen and support them when they need it.

6. Feeling Heard is a Priority No Matter What

Feeling Heard is a Priority No Matter What

As your teenager grows and develops their sense of self, they may struggle with feeling like their voice isn’t being heard or valued. It’s important to create a safe space where your teen feels comfortable sharing their thoughts and opinions, even if they differ from your own. Encourage your teen to express themselves and validate their feelings, even if you don’t necessarily agree with their perspective.  Teenagers are exploring what values they want to keep or reject and will continue this process well into early adulthood.  Allow them to stay curious!

7. Positive Reinforcement is Like a Moving Meditation

Positive Reinforcement

Teenagers need positive reinforcement to build their self-esteem and confidence. They may feel like they’re constantly being criticized or compared to others, which can lead to feelings of inadequacy or low self-worth. It’s important to offer positive feedback and praise when your teen does something well (even if it’s something small) or demonstrates positive behavior. Help your teen build a positive self-image by focusing on their strengths and encouraging their growth. Teach them to celebrate successes, small wins, and learn from their mistakes.

In conclusion, parenting a teenager can be a great experience, despite it’s trials and tribulations.  You will make errors! There is no instruction manual and every child has different needs.  It is highly encouraged to have your own support as a parent, and finding an individual therapist or parenting coach can be a great resource as you navigate this stage with your child. Your teen will thank you (maybe not right away) for being a soft place to land!


Sarah Carmona, LCSW #87353 (she/her)

Clinical Director @ The Arrow House: The Adolescent Project

O: 657.282.4263

sarah@thearrowhouse.com

The High Cost of Keeping Secrets: How Family & Friends Get it So Terribly Wrong

The call or text arrives, and the person on the other end of the line is in crisis. Imagine a sort of 911 call that centers on a crisis rooted in a mental health moment running the gamut from afflicted, addicted, or affected as reported from the other end of the line.

Making the call or text is an act of power, of courage. It is a shift from holding a secret to expanding the circle to include an outsider. This place often holds ground as a red line in the minds of those who love those who suffer.

TELL NO ONE. PROMISE ME YOU WON’T SHARE THIS!

You know how it goes since you’ve lived it. At what cost? We spin in silence as the one we love swirls down the drain. We confuse the nature of secrecy that insulates mental health illness from help with something sacred.

Sacred is a baseline connection to the holy, of knowing and loving. The secret is by nature a withholding, a burden shared by few, that carries a high cost, according to clinical research.

Accessing help need not be secret. There is no shame, blame, or guilt in needing support from a professional. When a loved one who suffers confuses secretly with sacred, silence rushes in to feed the illness and suffering rather than help reduce it. We see those costs more easily outside our windows than in our homes. Award-winning creator Shonda Rhimes regularly features a secretive fork in the road as a pivot point for her storytelling power on her hits like Queen Charlotte, Bridgerton, and Scandal.

The costs of secret silence are extraordinary. The value of blowing secrecy up is equally profound. The booooom begins with picking up the phone or tapping out a text.

These calls never bother me; never an intrusion. They don’t distress or distract. Answering them is my calling.

Breaking secrecy is the first step in accessing help, breaking the cycle of stillness and isolative do-nothing. Believe this — when someone says NO in any way to help, you are qualified to intervene.

As an interventionist, I create a safe and supportive environment for families to share their thoughts, what I call their Eyewitness Accounts. Just the truth explaining:

  • What have you seen?
  • What are your fears?
  • What is your hope?

If you know anything about me, you know I am an invitational interventionist. That is, I advocate using only as much pressure as needed and beginning with initiating the identified loved one to meet with the group, where we prioritize the safety of all in the room.

 


Brad Lamm, CIP || America’s interventionist & author of How to Help Someone You Love: A New Way to Intervene: Brad founded the residential trauma program Breathe Life Healing Center in West Hollywood, CA, in 2013. Brad’s other books include Quit Vaping, JUST 10 LBS, On Breathing: A Recovery Meditation, and Crystal Clear & Sexually Recovered, the clinical guide supporting recovery from sexualized drug use. Breathe Life Healing Centers is a certified minority-owned & operated business (LGBTQIA+) that has treated more than 4000 patients since opening its doors while providing more than $4M in scholarship care for those in need.

Kathleen Murphy, LMFT || Kathleen is Breathe Life Healing Center’s founding Executive Clinical Director. Her career is built on more than 30 years of experience working with people suffering from substance use issues complicated by relational trauma. Kathleen has used Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, IFS, AEDP, Interpersonal Neurobiology, polemics, and didactics. Her focus on psycho-education, experiential group processes heavily influenced by attachment theory, and psychodrama techniques assist clients in reframing and reclaiming the self as a being in a relationship.

How Alcohol Robs Us of Our Most Valuable Commodity: Time

As a human being with the unusual job that involves managing substance use interventions with folks, I have seen the devastating impact of alcohol and drugs on people, places, and things – yes all of them. And while fentanyl has received a lot of attention in recent years for its deadly effects, there is another substance that is killing far more people each day, every day in this great nation of ours: ALCOHOL.

The original sin in my Quaker household, where the saying went “I don’t drink, and I don’t chew (tobacco) and I don’t go with girls who do”, alcohol has always been the headline wreaking havoc yet it’s the least talked about these days anyway due to the opioid epidemic and the insane potency of its cousins – like fentanyl.

Legal and readily available, alcohol is the only killer most of us can easily throw in the grocery basket at our local Trader Joes to take home for the kill. For most, who develop an alcohol dependency, they don’t even see it coming as a front seat threat.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), alcohol-related deaths have been on the rise in recent years, with more than 88,000 people dying from booze in the United States in 2020. That’s more than double the # of deaths attributed to fentanyl, which claimed the lives of about 36,000 people in the same span.

Alcohol addiction causes a litany of health problems, including liver disease, heart disease, stroke, and certain types of cancer. That’s all the inside stuff that occurs, without even touching on yet, the falls, the crashes, the trauma and relational damage it wreaks. Not a surprise to anyone but those who have it generally, alcohol alos is a leading trigger for mental health issues such as depression and anxiety.

In addition to its physical and mental health effects, alcohol dependency also carries with it crushing social consequences. It can strain relationships with family and friends, lead to job loss and financial instability, and increase the risk of legal trouble and life behind bars.

Alcohol is one of the greatest thieves of time too – that is the most sacred collateral any of us have, the minutes, hours and years we get to spend seeking out experiences and LIFE.

Despite all these risks, alcohol remains the most socially acceptable and widely consumed substance on the planet. Most people view alcohol use as a harmless way to unwind or socialize, and I find the easiest to minimize in our minds, since the social capital it carries is often sexy and sought after.

We see it reflected in film and TV, music and art as an elixir promoted to make life better. Most families I work with, haven’t  realized the dangers of alcoholism until it is the goose is pretty well cooked.

As a national village, we need to do more to normalize the discussion of alcohol addiction and its brutal consequences. This includes increasing access to detox services treatment and support, promoting education and awareness about the risks of alcohol, and implementing policies that discourage drinking.

If we want to reduce the number of deaths caused by substance abuse, we need to recognize that alcohol is just as dangerous as any other addictive substance, and take action to address the root causes of addiction. Hope is dope, but to stand by waiting for our friends and family who over do it with booze, to simmer down on their own, is a failed step.

Hope without action is magical thinking.

I’ve not had a hangover or rough day after, since February 5, 2003.

Figuring this life landscape out has helped me recover a life I’d dreamed of for years, but as my attachment (and yes, dependency) to alcohol increased, my value of life, decreased.

A Better Intervention: A Powerful Way to Helping Someone You Love

As an addiction and mental health expert, I’ve witnessed firsthand the devastating impact that substance abuse and mental health issues can have on individuals and their families. For years, traditional interventions were the norm – confrontational and sometimes aggressive approaches aimed at “trapping someone to treat them” or lying to them to get them in to the room with those who love them. But as we learn more about the complex nature of addiction and mental health, a new approach is gathering steam. I know, since I practice it daily, and have used this new and improved intervention model in more than 1200 cases. Invitational Intervention is a better way to intervene, and allows for a the one in crisis (the “Identified Loved One” or ILO) to receive treatment instead of being so angry they can’t even think straight.

This intervention model, where the ILO is invited to their own intervention is  based on the groundbreaking ARISE studies out of the University of Pennsylvania. The ARISE (A Relational Intervention Sequence for Engagement) model, developed by five researchers including Dr. Judith Landau & Dr. James Garrett, is a compassionate and inclusive approach that seeks to engage individuals struggling with addiction or mental health issues in a collaborative and supportive manner.

Unlike traditional interventions that often rely on confrontation and ultimatums, Invitational Intervention focuses on building trust, fostering healthy communication, and creating a supportive environment where individuals feel empowered to speak up, and seek help.

The causes and conditions of addiction and mental health issues are complex and multifaceted, often stemming from unresolved emotional pain, complex trauma, or other underlying issues. With this new way to intervene, we find the ways to break free from the blame, shame and guilt that has been our benchmarks for normal. We come to understand how “broken” or “bad” people, are instead just individuals who are hurting and in need of support.

One of the key principles of Invitational Intervention is the importance of empathy and compassion. Instead of using blame or shame, loved ones are encouraged to approach the ILO with love, understanding, and a non-judgmental attitude. The goal is to create a safe space where the individual feels heard and validated, which can help reduce resistance and defensiveness.

Another core concept is the emphasis on collaboration and inclusion. Your ILO is invited to participate in the process, and their input and feedback are valued. It’s not about “ganging up” on the individual, but rather working together as a team to create a plan for recovery that is tailored to the individual’s needs and preferences.

This collaborative approach empowers the individual to become a stakeholder in their own recovery alongside those who care for them.

One thing I know for sure, having managed so many of these life-changing interventions is that the invitational approach has a higher success rate compared to traditional interventions. In fact, research has shown that individuals who go through Invitational Intervention are more likely to enter and stay in treatment, and have better long-term outcomes compared to those who experience confrontational interventions.

With this style of intervention, which I call Breakfree Intervention, we use only as much pressure as needed, and seek to “talk with the ILO instead of just about them” in non-confrontational and inclusive ways. This reduces resistance and increases motivation for change.

Also key — the importance of ongoing support and follow-up. It’s not a one-time event, but rather a process that involves ongoing engagement and support. Loved ones are encouraged to continue to provide support and encouragement to the individual, even after they enter treatment. To this goal, I created Family Class to accomplish this, as it helps reinforce positive changes and promote the group’s understanding of recovery norms and challenges.

It’s a leap of faith to open your mind to actually inviting your loved one to their own intervention, yet this is the way. This IS the way. The way we demystify and declutter the day in the life of a family that so many dread.  I love the work I do with families in helping their loved ones begin to have “more good — less bad” in their lives.

This Breakfree Intervention is a powerful and effective approach that has a legacy of transforming lives and reconnecting families for good.

4 Powerful Self-Soothing Techniques for Anxiety & Mental Illness

Self-soothing is one of the most effective tools we have to get through the most painful and scary moments in life. While these techiques don’t solve any problems for us, they do help us manage the fear and anxiety that prevent us from taking action. Self-soothing is also crucial for maintaining mental health and staying recovered from addiction or an eating disorder.

We all struggle with anxiety from time to time. Even though it’s uncomfortable, it’s a natural and sometimes useful sensation. It helps us feel when something is wrong or dangerous long before we figure it out logically. If all is well with our natural anxiety response, the bad feeling shouldn’t stick around. Anxiety is supposed to subside soon after we remove ourselves from the sketchy situation or solve the problem.

For most people, anxiety and panic attacks are rare occurrences which are stressful, but not major life problems. Unfortunately though, for many of us that’s not the case. Nearly 1 our of every 5 Americans struggle with chronic, heightened anxiety that doesn’t go away even when the danger has passed.

The Self-Soothing Skills Toolbox: 4 Effective Tips and Techniques

If you’re having a hard time dealing with recurrent anxiety and overwhelming emotions, these # self-soothing tools can help. They are simple, affordable, healthy and non-addictive things we can do on our own. If you ever find yourself feeling out-of-control, start with taking a deep breath. After that, you can reach into your toolbox of self-soothing skills and techniques so you can move past the anxiety and get back to normal.

1. Mindful Breathing

Let’s start out with the simplest, and most readily available self-soothing technique. Mindful breathing should be our 1st response to any crisis. Think of it like the EMT showing up at an emergency scene. It can help us get through the immediate situation and, just like EMT, take us to a more secure place where we are actually able to address the problem.

There’s no one single way to breathe mindfully. Experiment and find a technique that feels comfortable and soothing for you. One popular technique goes like this:

  • Start by closing your eyes and breathing normally.
  • Imagine that all of your anxiety, fear, and stress is a material that’s floating in the air around you like a toxin.
  • Now, imaging that cloud of anxiety in the air, start to breathe it in.
  • Like what a plant does with carbon dioxide, your body will metabolize the toxin and you will blow out pure, clean air.
  • Repeating this process, you will eventually “clean up” all the anxiety in the area and you will open your eyes to a calmer, non-toxic environment.

2. Walk through nature

For anxiety that follows us home and just won’t let up, this is the tool we need. Walking through nature is deeply relaxing and quickly alleviates an anxious mood. Research shows that a walk through nature immediately soothes us, and promotes mental health. Also, brain imaging confirms that nature walks reduce blood flow to the parts of our brain that process anxiety and negative thinking.

So if you’re feeling stuck in an anxious, tense mood, put your walking shoes on and get outside!

3. Use your Hands

Sometimes, we just need to DO something to release all of that anxious energy. Working on something with our hands is self-soothing because it is an excellent distraction from our racing thoughts. Repetitive, easy tasks can help distract us from the issue and stop the negative thought cycle.

Hand distractions are a great self-soothing tool for anyone feeling anxious. However, it’s important to note that those with excoriating disorder (skin-picking disorder), trichotillomania (hair-pulling disorder), or rep

Here are some things to try:

  • Drawing: It doesn’t have to come out beautiful. You can even just scribble if you like!
  • Knitting/Crocheting
  • Coloring in a mandala or some other design/image.
  • Playing with a fidget spinner
  • Chopping veggies for dinner later

4. Create a Literal Tool Box of Soothing Objects

Find a nice box that you like, or just grab any old cardboard shoebox. Then just fill it with soothing objects! Keep it around the house, in your car, or at work. Some people make tiny to-go kits that fit in their bags too.

Here are a few examples of nice, soothing objects to include:

  • A bottle of fragrant essential oil
  • A bundle of comforting photos (polaroids are great for this)
  • A small book
  • Art supplies
  • Fidget Toys or silly Putty
  • A candle

Common Obstacles to Self-Soothing

A lot of adults feel like they can’t use self-soothing behaviors because they are afraid of feeling babyish, weird or silly. Another common obstacle is the common, although completely false, belief that one “doesn’t deserve” to take care of oneself.

Whatever the obstacle is, we should try our best to overcome it. After all, taking charge of our mental health and deliberately confronting our emotions is the mature thing to do.

Need Help?

If you feel like you still need help then let us help. We are here to make you feel better again!

The Top 10 Most Hilarious and Relatable Recovery Memes for Anyone with Addiction or Mental Illness

Getting past an addiction or a mental health disorder is anything but a joke. It’s always complicated, sometimes frustrating, and it usually drains all of our energy by the end of the day. So, if you’re in recovery, most likely you could do with a good laugh right about now! Thankfully, these 10 hilarious and relatable recovery memes can help us find humor where it usually hides.

One: Explaining Recovery

recovery meme 1

Therapy, medication, wild ups and downs, horrible symptoms: these are things that we deal with every day which most people don’t understand. Trying to explain it all to someone who can’t relate is like trying to instantly become a neuroscientist, chemist, psychologist, and philosophy professor all at once. This meme just about sums up the feeling. 

Two: Why are you ____?

why you depressed

Yup, swap out the word ‘depressed’ for whichever mental health disorder you’re specifically struggling with and bam! we’ve all had this same exact conversation at some time or another.

What do people even expect you to say when they ask something like?

  • Why are you addicted to X, Y or Z?
  • Why are you so Bipolar?
  • Why are you always so sad/anxious?

Um… because I am! That’s my disorder, duh! Can we talk about something more productive now?

Three: Hard to Swallow Pills

self esteem meme

Addictions and most mental health disorders can really mess with our thoughts and self-esteem. It’s common for our disorders to make us think that we’re unloved, or secretly hated which is exactly why this meme is so relatable. We’ve all freaked out at least once about a relationship we thought was in danger, and then been reassured that it is in fact perfectly fine, and our friend does indeed love us.

Four: Just Cheer Up!

just cheer up

Wow! What a brilliant idea to just cheer up. Let’s just not worry about the fact that depression stems from extremely complicated origins that we don’t yet fully understand including our brain’s levels of neurotransmitters and electrochemical functioning that may also be attributed to a genetic predisposition to the disorder that we have absolutely no control over….

Five: It’s Time!

anxiety its time

I don’t know if the feeling of anxiety has ever been depicted so accurately in one meme! People often ask, ‘what are you so anxious about?’ As if there were a clear definite answer. More often than not, mental illness makes us feel a type of anxiety that’s so nebulous we can’t easily describe the source. It’s just there.

Six: Surprise! I’m Back!

Relapse is the most frustrating thing in the world. We work sooooo hard on getting our symptoms, cravings, and destructive behaviors in check and then one day we get a flare up. It’s going to happen sometimes. That’s just part of the whole deal, but that doesn’t mean we’re not going to still sit there and think “Why!?”

Seven: When You’re Trying to Help, but You Need Help Too 

trucks mental breakdown

When you finally find a group of friends that truly understand your recovery journey, it’s great… Up until you guys happen to have breakdowns at the same exact time! Someone who is in crisis can’t exactly bring someone else out of a crisis, it usually just ends up in a bigger crisis.

That’s why, on a more serious note, we encourage all friend groups to be ready to reach for outside help when things get out of control. Even though you guys are practically experts in mental health after all the treatment you’ve been through, we have to recognize our limits. Contact an interventionist if you or one of your friends are in a serious or persistent crisis.

Eight: Only Recovery, No Therapy!

Let’s be honest guys, therapy is hard! It’s not always such a relaxing and lovely experience as it’s portrayed to be. Usually, we end up crying a bunch, recognizing new problems, and feeling wild ups and downs.

Wouldn’t it be great if we could just get to the recovery part and skip the hard work part?

Nine: True Love

This meme is bittersweet but so accurate. If you’re recovering from addiction, mental illness, or an eating disorder then you know too well how fragile relationships can be. Friends, lovers, family members: it doesn’t matter what kind of relationship it is or how strong it’s supposed to be. People who don’t understand the symptoms will often respond by letting you down and disappearing. It’s a sad thing, but it also means the people who stick around are the ones that truly love us.

Ten: Self Care and Positivity!

self care meme

This pic is so hilarious because it really feels like using self-care and positivity is the best weapon we have around to conquer our symptoms of mental illness. If self-care and positivity aren’t cutting it right now though, and you’re thinking about relapse it’s time to get some extra help.

Thank you for checking out our favorite, most relatable recovery memes! If they helped brighten up an otherwise grey day, then that means they did their job.

Remember, if you or someone you love is going through a difficult moment right now we can help. Just reach out to us by clicking the button below and we will try to provide the assistance you need.